[Tyr Zalo Hawk]: 712.The Tyr Files.RTQ.Friends.Charlie

Charlie: You keep typing 'jsut'.
Tyr: Shut up! I just came from Spanish, my English is a bit messed up. Besides, 'jsut' is totally the Spanish word for 'just.'

Tyr: Whoa... the baby just kicked.
Charlie: O_O EXCUSE ME?!

Tyr: So, last night, I was reading some of the worst and the best pick up lines ever. And one was on both lists.
Charlie: And, what was it?
Tyr: 'Nice shoes, wanna fuck?'
Charlie: Huh...
A while later... Charlie is typing a paper in English...
Charlie: Hey, Tyr. How do you say shoes in Spanish?
Tyr: Zapatos, why?
Charlie: Ok, and how about 'wanna?'
Tyr: Quiera, now why?
Charlie: No reason. Hey Tyr...
Tyr: Ya...?
Charlie: Buenos zapatos... quiera joder?

Playing Super Smash Bros Melee...
Tyr: *playing as Zelda* Who's the princess? I'm the princess!
Charlie: *playing as Peach* We'll see about that!
The battle rages, just before the final blow...
Tyr: I'm the princess... *lightning kick to Peach's head, sending her flying into oblivion* Bitch.

Charlie: You know what Kenny, this is your apple. But you can't have it all right now, you only get this little tiny bit, and then you get the rest when you're 18, because you're an Indian.
Later that same night...
Charlie: Oh no, just for that. I'm taking your apple! You can have this paper towel instead.
Tyr: Charlie, things that racist haven't been done in hundreds of years... that deserves a White Guy High Five!

Tyr: You know, Charlie. Kenny and Marty are probably gonna kill us in our sleep now.
Charlie: Pfft... probably.

Charlie: Hey, I like Megadeth.
Tyr: That's because you've no taste buds on your music tongue.

Tyr: Go on, Charlie. I DARE you to sit down.
Charlie: *sitting down across from Tyr* The seat... has been taken.

Tyr: Charlie, I'll kill you.
Charlie: No, you won't. Dying only happens to bad people.

Tyr: I'm touching my nonexistent nipple.
Charlie: ... ... ... ... that kinda sounds like...
Tyr: What, GHOST PORN?!

Charlie: Gah! Jesus is laughing at me! And he's got no right to laugh at me, I didn't get crucified. I should be laughing at him!

Charlie: I just ended up on the wrong side of the thing...
Tyr: I think you ended up on the wrong side of life.
Charlie: You're a potato!

Tyr: (all sarcastic) Man, I love how gay my laptop is.
Charlie: When I turn around, that sentence will not have happened. *turns around, grinning* Hi, Tyr. Man am I glad that you didn't just say you loved how gay your laptop is.

Charlie: The day as we know it is done, and now, I go into a new day.

Tyr: I'll decrease YOUR brightness.
Charlie: Oooh... them's fightin' words.

Tyr: Charlie, your pants are not sexy.
Charlie: My pants are very sexy, Tyr.

Tyr: Now THAT is a sexy guitar.
Charlie: Mmhmm...
Tyr: I mean, that guitar got all the babes in high school.
Charlie: I'm tellin' ya...

Tyr: Dangit! I just don't know what to do...
Charlie: Set it on fire, then run away.

Charlie: Man, Tyr, you should've gotten 'most likely to be remembered.' You've scarred way more teachers than Dom has.

Charlie: *closes the window* I just made it about ten degrees more bearable in here.

Tyr: MANITOBA!!!
Charlie: YEA!

Charlie: Tyr, you should, like, totally get me a book.
Tyr: How about you get up and get it yourself?
Charlie: I can't.
Tyr: Why not?
Charlie: Because... my legs are like... broken.

Charlie: Ugh... I hate Necco Wafers.
Tyr: I'll eat them.
Charlie: Oh my god, dude. I like... owe you my life now.

Tyr: Charlie, just shut up.
Charlie: You're right, that's no way to talk to a man who ate that many Necco Wafers for me.

Charlie: Ya, well your mom is dead.
Tyr: Ya well... your mom is vivaquarius!
Charlie: That was totally uncalled for.

Charlie: I used to be a dog, but I got better.

Charlie: Will you stop complaining?
Tyr: Charlie, why don't YOU try getting your neck sliced open and come back to school the next day, then we'll see how you feel.
Charlie: Jeez, maybe I will!

Charlie: Tyr, your scars are not that big of a deal.
Tyr: Charlie, you try losing your mom and get 3rd degree burns scars over 80% of your body, go through 50-60 surgeries in less than 16 years, and then we'll talk.
Charlie: Dude, I already have. Your sauce is just weak.

Charlie: Jeff, go suck out Wayne Burland's god damn bone marrow.