[chuchutrain]: 63.Junk.Escape

She sat there on the seat cover of the toilet as she held her hands over her face to muffle the sobs that began to gently rack her body. Why was she crying? She didn’t even know. She wiped her tears from her face as tears slowly flowed down her cheeks touching the edge of her lips and giving her the taste of the salty liquid. She then heard the familiar door shutting telling her he had left, again. She stood up and pulled her shirt off and took her pants off as she turned on the water to the shower and turning it up as hot as she could stand. She carefully stepped in and let the water spray down onto her face as the water mixed with the tears. Now she didn’t know if she was crying anymore, it was all the same, her whole self was covered in water and it made no difference whether she was crying or not. She took a long hot shower as she thought about what they had said to her, even if he tried to cheer her up it had not worked. Had he noticed the hurt in her eyes when she had heard the words? Maybe. Maybe that’s why he had tried to make a joke, but it was a horrible joke and it just made it worst. She didn’t even need a shower, she just said it to get away, get away before her tears flowed freely from her eyes infront of them. She stood under the scalding hot water as the steam rose from the tub and she watched her hair fall by her head as the water flowed through it. She bent over slightly to turn off the water as she reached out into the steam and grabbed her towel and wrapped it around her body as she stepped out of the shower and walked over to the mirror where her dripping image stared back at her. She could feel the drop of water that clung to her eyelashes as she closed her eyes and opened them to watch the drop of water roll down her cheek as if it was her tear falling. She sighed and grabbed her dry face cloth and wiped her face getting rid of the water on her face. She put her smile on her face and got changed as she walked out of the washroom and saw her mother and acted as if nothing happened. And there she sits writing all of this. Writing has become her escape, nothing can change that.



© Stephanie Chu, 2005